U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
