only if we run a train.
done.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
