Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
We need to get me chipped asap
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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