Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
