I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
