I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
