where am i from again
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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