I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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