Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
She told me I should be a condom model.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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