Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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