No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
