the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
and you fell through a lawn chair
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
