Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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