She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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