i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
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