Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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