Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
and you fell through a lawn chair
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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