Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
