Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
