Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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