Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize