it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
A bitchslap is in order.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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