ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
