I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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