Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
