He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Randomize
