I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
