this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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