All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
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