Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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