I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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