something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
