i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
