Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
