And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
