Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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