I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
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