Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
