I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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