Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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