I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
