I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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