if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
she pinky promised me she was 18
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
