i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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