this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
