OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I'm at about main and main street
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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