yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
