my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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