why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
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