Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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